Thursday, July 29, 2010


So, if you believe the current research going around these days, you might think it was a good thing to, oh, pay attention to your baby... Sorry, I'm just mildly appalled that we had to do research to prove that paying attention/giving affection to one's child has a proportionally positive effect on their mental health, even well into adulthood. So, in case you needed an excuse to throw a little extra attention and affection your kid's way, this report says you should.

In other "duh" news (this section could alternately be titled, 'Wherein She Wins The Most Observant Mother Of The Year Award'), as I was sweeping chunks of curdled milk vomit out of's mouth last night, I noticed there were some small patches inside his cheeks near the corners of his mouth that weren't wiping off...


So yeah. Suddenly, the need to nurse every hour started to make sense. Very likely, the hunger indicators (gnawing on fist/fingers, fussing, rooting) were in fact 'Hey, Mama, My Mouth Hurts' indicators. I have no idea how long it's been since the thrush came back, but I'm guessing some time about 4 or so days ago, when the fussiness started. In all fairness, the boys both have chunky vomit often enough that it's hard to notice an unmoving white patch on the side of their cheek, because there are always white patches all over their mouths.

Luckily, we have plenty of medication to go around again, and unlike their reflux medicine, they actually like the nasty, sticky-sweet, neon yellow, banana-flavored goo that is used to treat the thrush. I, personally, don't really care for the funky-scented cream-goo used to treat my nipples, but so be it. Thrush. Round two. Here we go again.

Also, yesterday at 7:30 p.m., when I finally quit nursing the boys (that particular session started at around noon), I made the executive decision that it wasn't doing any of us any favors to keep up with the once-an-hour pattern. The boys were both hungry and frustrated, because I was literally tapped dry, and while they were getting a little something, they weren't getting enough to fill up. So, we gave them formula, and they each took about two ounces, and my poor, beleagured nipples got a rest. It seemed to trigger some sort of reset button, because since then, they've tuck to an every 2-3 hour schedule (including a 4 hour stretch last night! Yippie!). We'll see if it sticks...

And, additionally, in the whole 'sleep begets sleep' realm, they've been pleasantly napping today, first at the doctor's office while I waited for my appointment, and then again after nursing just before 11 a.m. (and miracle of miracles, after some serious work, they actually napped while laying down on the bed! Granted, I was laying next to them, curled around them with my hands on each of them, and it was a fitful sleep, but for 45 minutes, they napped somewhere besides ON me...). They woke up to nurse at just before 1:00 p.m., and now, they're asleep again (though this time, back on my lap on the nursing pillow... baby steps...).

Anyway, being home alone with them is hard, but bit by bit, I am figuring things out. It's slow-going, but there is small progress being made.

In other news, I have been given the all-clear to return to full activity! I may bribe H by saying that certain married-people-activities are much more enjoyable when one has had the chance to relieve some stress with a little treadmill-time. We'll see whether I have the time or energy to run once he's home from work, but boy, could I use it right now...

And I know I haven't said it enough, but thank you. Seriously, thank you all so much for all of the advice and input. I'm still (at points) stabbing in the dark with this whole parenting thing and reading about how you all have managed to survive things is SO helpful. Really. Even if I don't end up doing things the way you've suggested, just reading about different perspectives helps me to figure out how I want to go about solving various issues. So, keep the advice coming. It is always, ALWAYS appreciated.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Question And Answer Style

I am a lazy, preoccupied lady, and thus, I haven't responded to several questions that have been asked of me in the comment section. Of course, it's also the fact that I've been forgetful lately, too. I mean to write an email, but forget about 2 minutes after the thought crosses my mind. So if the opportunity doesn't instantly present itself to complete a task, it may be hours or days (or never) before it gets done.


--Are the boys identical?

Highly doubtful. They look very different-- He.nry is fair-skinned and fair-haired, with wide-set eyes that grow increasingly blue by the day. He is also our little chunk-chunk, dense and round, with a head not unlike his father's (giant, because of the giant brain, right?). Jac.k is a little darker in skin tone (still fair but with an olive undertone) with dark brown hair. His eyes are getting greyer by the day, but it's uncertain where they will end up, color-wise. He is long and thin-- a little longer than his brother, but weighs a pound less--, though his face is finally filling out a little.

Personality-wise (in so much as there is personality at this point), seems to be a fretter, constantly in a state of readiness to get upset about the slightest thing, but only getting truly hysterical when he is ignored (bad Mama peeing in the toilet in the next room instead of wearing adult diapers so she NEVER LEAVES MY SIDE...). Henr.y, on the other hand, is fairly calm, occasionally having screaming fits prompted, one can only guess, by a change in the music of the spheres. Seriously, kid is smiling, then SCREAAAAAAAAMS, and then goes right back to smiling.

So yeah. Probably not identical.

--What is the awesome swing you have?

This is it. I got it because it is supposed to have a great battery life. In retrospect, I would have instead registered for two small travel swings, I think, but this is nice to have none the less. It's very soft and squishy-comfy, which probably appeals to me more than the boys, but maybe they like it, too. Who knows? It honestly doesn't get much use now because it's huge and the only place there's room for it is in the playroom, and our life right now is spent mostly camped in our bed, or out and about.

--What is the breastfeeding pillow you mentioned?

The EZ 2 Nurse Twins nursing pillow (um, this one...). It's a giant, firm, horseshoe-shaped cushion that holds the babies at boob-level when rested on your lap. The fabrics in which the pillow is currently available appear to have been chosen by Michelle Duggar (which is fine... nothing wrong with Mrs. Duggar, but her taste in fabrics is probably different than mine...), but since this is a nursing pillow, it's not like you're going to be wearing it on the streets of Milan, being judged by the world's fashionistas. More likely (if your experience is like mine) it will quickly be covered by breast milk (both straight from the boob AND in various stages of digestion from the babies' mouths), pee, sweat (MAN, it's been so frickin' hot and humid lately...), possibly some poo, and drips and drops of whatever food or drink you have time to cram into your mouth in those precious moments when they're both occupied and not wailing. Thank goodness the covers are washable...

But yes. Indispensable in my efforts to tandem breast feed the boys.

Just a break here to ask why, if NC's state lottery is (like many other state lotteries) set up to benefit the education system, WHY is there any sort of financial crisis in the school system? I mean, I know it's a total joke that lotteries ever actually benefit schools as they say they will when they are set up (great way to get voter support for what amounts to a tax on the mathmatically-challenged), but during a time when the economy is in such a state that we can't afford to keep the teachers we have, why aren't the lottery proceeds making up that difference?

--Why don't you use formula to supplement?

Um, here is where I have to sheepishly admit a few things:
1. I kinda do use formula already. Right now, that has only been in situations where I cannot nurse both at the same time, like when we're out at a restaurant, and they both get suddenly, screamingly hungry. I am a rock star at times, but I cannot tandem nurse twins in public yet.

And on occasion (maybe 2-3 times so far) when I am at my wits end, and have been nursing the babies non-stop for hours on end with only occasional 10-15 minute breaks, I pass off whichever is the most starving baby to H so that he can feed him a bottle of formula.

See, I don't really subscribe to the idea that formula is tantamount to poison, nor do I think that formula is some slippery slope that leads to instantaneous weaning from lack of supply. I also don't think that formula is particularly convenient (I hate washing dishes, and bottles, with all their annoying little parts, are particularly irritating). But I do still think that breast milk is best, and if I can give it to them, I prefer to choose breast milk over formula. BUT when I don't have enough expressed breast milk to give in whatever circumstance, I see nothing wrong with giving formula. And I may pick a feeding to be done by H (with whatever expressed milk we have on hand OR formula, though with the feeding schedule we're on, there won't be much more expressed breast milk because there is simply no time to pump, nor any milk left after so rigorous a schedule) so that my nipples can have some time off to heal a little.

2. Here is where I also admit that the only time of day when they don't eat once an hour is overnight. They (blessedly) will usually go two hours between feedings with the occasional three hour stretch (and once, the other night, we had a FOUR hour stretch, though we paid for it the rest of the night with those once-an-hour feedings...). So, despite being torn apart during the day, I do, actually, get some rest overnight. I'm no Sleeping Beauty, but I cumulatively get about 6-7 hours a night, which is enough to keep me going through the crazy days.

Speaking of, how does one go about getting babies to sleep someplace besides on my lap? Night time is good-- we've got the co-sleeping situation figured out--, but during the day, they fall asleep being held (or against me on the nursing pillow), and will sleep for a few minutes once put down, but inevitably wake up screaming until they are held and/or fed again.

The every-hour thing has made it incredibly difficult to leave the house, but regardless, we will be all leaving the house tomorrow morning so that I can go to my six-week follow up OB appointment, at which point I will hopefully be cleared to return to normal activities. I know my libido's supposed to be in the toilet these days, but that is not the case. I'm supposed to be all pissy with my husband ((and at points, I am, as as he with me), but I'm really not. I have been really craving physical affection from him, and those moments are, sadly, few and far between. I don't just mean the chance to get jiggy with it, but more just the chance to hug, or kiss, or just hold each other's hand, etc. But yes, being given clearance to recommence the deed (doesn't Dooce have a post about that?) will be nice. And I also really can't wait to be given the clearance to run again. I'll be basically starting almost from scratch again, I know (hello, Couch To 5k Program! It's been a while, no?), but I'm ready to start again. Who knows when I'll find the time, but since it's my main form of stress relief, it is SO needed right now.

We will also all leave the house again on Friday morning to go to Book Babies at our local library (thanks, Serah, for the suggestion. Brilliant idea.). I don't think the boys will get much out of it, but it will be nice to have some sort of activity beyond sucking on my boobs for them to try.

Um, does anyone have advice on how to care for cloth diapers? I've looked at plenty of websites, and they have conflicting advice on how to wash, etc. I don't know if I'm using the right detergent, or whether I'm drying them wrong, or whatever, but the boys are finally getting big enough to use cloth on a regular basis, and so we are almost completely switched off of disposables, and I'd like to get in the habit of caring for the diapers in the right way.

Last, since I know this is the real reason you all stop by:

My Boys
My men, Henr.y hides in the Ergo, while hangs on Papa's lap.

Happy Henry
He.nry. Kiss, kiss, kiss. I love those cheeks!

Karate-Hand Jack will cut a bitch if he needs to... That's his typical hand pose, karate-hand. Man, he cracks me up!

Good Morning!
The Squash Duo. Love, love, love.

More can be seen in the Flickr set, J.ack and H.enry.

Um, okay. I think that's all they'll give me time for today. Apparently even the boob can get boring eventually...

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Bits Are All I Have Time For

-Mom is gone, and I am profoundly sad about it. I've gotten so used to having her around. Despite our past disagreements, she was really great while here. Sniping comments were at an all-time low, and she really was here to do what she could to help me care for the boys. I have to admit: I'm terrified to do it on my own when H goes back to work on Monday. Of course, it's not just her extra hands to help with the babies that I'll miss. I generally don't mind being on my own throughout the day, as I've been pretty much spending my days by myself for the better part of two years now (with the exception of school for an hour or two a day during the first nine months of that), but it's been nice to have someone stop by during the day, just for the chance to chat. We spent most every day while she was here running errands or going for lunch, or planning dinner. It's kind of lonely now. Sigh.

Anyway, tomorrow is the true test, I think. H is technically only gone for a half-day, but that's still 4 hours on my own with babies that may or may not be screamy (but probably screamy).

--That's the sad thing. They are super-screamy, but most of the time (unless it's hunger or reflux) as long as you can pick them up and hold them, bounce them, etc., they calm down fairly easily. But when there's two, there's very little you can do to calm both at once, and so what starts as a little fussing or slight crying turns into screams and wails and full-on fits because I cannot get to them fast enough or hold them forever, etc. Twin mom guilt is a serious thing. I get the idea that either of these boys would actually be quite delightful babies if they were born separately.

--Speaking of hunger, good GOD, they eat a lot. I mean, like, they keep going through days where they eat every hour on the hour (meaning that I start feeding at 10:00, finish at 10:30-ish, burp them, change them, and then, they scream for 15 minutes until I relent and feed them again. They appear to be gaining weight, and they have plenty of poopy and wets, so I'm pretty sure they're getting enough, but I really hope this ends soon. I hear that it's not uncommon to have phases like this, but it's killing me. It's making me want to stop breast feeding, because my nipples are pink and burny-feeling (though after a single, blessed 3 hour break, they no longer feel like that, so I know it's the frequency, and not a poor latch or anything like that), and I'm tired, and it's clear that they are STARVING all the time, and I start to resent them, and I hate that. I actually slammed the door to the bathroom this morning after being awoken for the third hour *just* after managing to fall back asleep, because He.nry had awoken AGAIN, demanding to be fed, and I was just at my wit's end. I seriously don't know what to do in these circumstances. If they are eating until the breast is empty (usually takes about 20 minutes, but I nurse them for as long as they want, which is usually 30 minutes)), how on EARTH can they be hungry again just a few minutes later? And how can that pattern hold ALL FRICKIN' DAY?

After a day or two like that, they seem to fall back into the pattern of eating every 2-3 hours (but usually more like every 2 hrs), but sadly, they choose different days to be like this, and since I'm attempting to keep them on similar schedules, I end up with a half asleep baby trying to nurse while his brother screams his fool head off because I can't whip out the boob fast enough.

--Along those lines, how in the world does one manage to nurse lying down? Books and websites throw it out as some sort of easy-peasy solution (instructions: lay down. nurse.), but I guess my nipples don't point the right direction, because unless I want to suffocate my babies, then I cannot figure out how to get mouth and nipple lined up in such a way as to allow a boy to eat.

--um, yeah. Post ends as usual, with one-handed typing while both babies scream... yes, it is as pleasant as it sounds...

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Bits and Pieces

--Strawberry fruit bars are good. So are lime fruit bars.

--My boys are officially TOTAL fussers. They are rarely awake and content. Maybe this is normal, but today, I got my first 1/2 hour taste of complete meltdown mode while on my own (Mom was late coming over), and I honestly don't know how I'm going to handle it. How do you do it? I mean, seriously: Logistically, how is it done? If you have two children who SCREAMSCREAMSCREAM if they aren't being held or fed, how do you make it through the day? I get the idea that mine are going to be porkers, because I'll just shove a boob in their mouth to make them stop screaming...

--Newest nicknames for the boys are Barfy and Bang Bang (He.nry's our big barfer, and J.ack likes to slam his head into our chests when frustrated, i.e. ALL THE FRICKIN' TIME). I expect this to be the name of their first garage band.

--My mom bought me a massage, and I spent the entire time worrying about whether or not I was going to be able to relax enough to enjoy it. Yes, I spent a full hour being rubbed and pummeled and all I could do was fret over whether or not I was going to be able to relax. Stupid. However, when I got home, the boys stayed asleep in their car seats for 30-45 minutes, and those were the most productive 45 minutes I've had in forever. I got laundry sorted, and I fixed our wireless internet, and hooked up our new printer (went to get printer cartridges, and found that it would cost almost $70 to get new ones for the old printer OR it would cost $25.50 to buy the new version of our printer WITH cartridges... so we bought a new printer. Totally wasteful, but saved so dang much money it's absurd.) and got some cleaning done, too. WHY I didn't snooze is beyond me, but I think it almost felt better just to get some random chores done. WTF happened to me choosing chores over sleep? Sigh.

--We are considering getting an inflatable nursing pillow, because I cannot nurse without my special nursing pillow (again, MAJOR thanks, Tracy!), and I would like to possibly travel at some point. At what stage would I expect that a nursing pillow will no longer be as big of a benefit as it is right now? I mean, at what point will they start being a little more helpful in their participation in the nursing relationship? When would they likely be too big to keep using the nursing pillow? I ask only because I don't know if we will have a need to travel before then. Truthfully, we just need a second cover for the pillow we have, but I thought I might kill two birds with one stone and buy the travel pillow (so that I can wash the cover for the other pillow and still have a functioning pillow to use).

--Man, HOW is it possible to nurse twins without tandem nursing them? I would have completely given up nursing by now if I had to nurse one and then the other, especially as they generally get hungry at the same time. It's not the easiest thing to pick up on, and luckily, Jac.k is a champion feeder (Hen.ry's a little tougher to latch and stay latched), but it's almost become second nature to me to feed them at the same time.

--Henr.y is heading towards ten pounds (per bathroom scale-- (Me + He)-Me= something between 9.5 and 10 lbs). Jack is heading toward nine (between 8.5 and 9). My boys are getting so big! No wonder my back is killing me. Someday, I'll build the strength to hold them, I hope.

--I had more to say, but Screamer the Second just realized that I was not giving my full and undivided attention to him while he was sleeping, so we are again in full meltdown mode. Sigh. I know it gets better, but I just wonder when, and whether we'll make it that long.

Friday, July 16, 2010

One Month

For those playing along, for now, we have decided to split the difference with the cash we were given and get an inexpensive portable swing and to use some toward an Erg.o that Rachel found for us on NYC's craigslist. Our local craigslist isn't so great for higher-end items. You get plenty of used grac.o/fisher-price and/or winnie-the-p.ooh themed whatever (not that there is anything wrong with any of that-- I have plenty of it in my house right now) but you just won't find a lot of specialty items, and when you do, you often won't find that great of a deal on them. I found umpteen-million used exersaucer/jumper-type items, and so when the time comes that those things will be of use to us, I can probably find a used one (or two) for a fairly reasonable price.

And now, the real reason you stop by:

One Month

We are one month old today!

Holy McMoly. Somehow, I've managed to survive one month as the mother of twins. It's a flippin' miracle. And I've only broken down in frustrated tears once in the past week. Pretty good!

My mom is still here helping us, and today, her best friend arrived (my second mother) and so, now, we do have enough hands to really help. However, the arrival of Mom's friend means that her departure is imminent (part of the reason friend is here is to help Mom with the drive back home). And that SUCKS. It's not that I can't do it myself, but rather that without her here, there is no break for me, at least during the day. I just don't have any local friends. I really need to remedy that, but despite appearances to the contrary, I've actually become quite shy when meeting new people in person. So. Yeah. No real support system here. Mom will be missed, but I have been so lucky to have her as long as I did.

Sigh. How did you (or do you) go about meeting new people, especially meeting other mom-friend types? Who do you lean on for support?

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

State of Things, the Scream Edition

This post today is brought to you courtesy of the Miracle Blanket. I had half-heartedly tried a tight swaddle previously and had watched my boys lose their minds. But, at my wits end yesterday, I pulled out a couple of swaddle blankets I bought at a consignment sale, and lo and behold, both boys calmed down immediately.

I haven't really mentioned it, but I have a couple of screamers on my hands. They are on an antacid medication because they both barf up about half of what they eat, almost every time they eat, and combined with the screaming, the doctor suspected GERD. But so far, the medicine doesn't seem to be doing much to reduce either the barfing or the screaming. Granted, the are on a weak medication (a Zanta.c thing, I think) because the stronger stuff (infant Prilo.sec, I think) isn't covered by our pharmacy insurance and would cost $50 for a one month supply for one baby. And this ends up being one of those "Man, I feel guilty for having twins" thing, because for one baby, we might be able to swing that, but for two? I can't imagine adding $100 a month to our already tightened budget. I mean, if they really do have GERD, and that is the medicine that cures the problem, we would (of course) gladly add it to the budget. But I'm not entirely sure that is the problem. The barfing is a problem (sometimes it's overflow of undigested milk, sometimes it's mucous and milk, and sometimes, it's half-digested spit-up-style chunks-- most of the time, there's a progression of all three after a feeding), but mostly, the screaming, the apparent writhing in pain, the absolute inconsolable shrieking, and the insistence on eating often less than half an hour after finishing a long feeding-- those are the problems that I was hoping might be solved by the medicine. And considering that they aren't even really alleviated by the current medicine, I don't have a lot of faith that GERD is the real problem.

My aunt made a really generous gift of cash for the boys, and we are divided over what to buy. We have a swing that we love (and the boys love it), but it's HUGE, and we can't really move it from room-to-room, and I get really nervous having them in a room where I can't hear them (and moving the monitor here and there as needed is a pain, too). And of course, they both like it, so it would be great to have two of them, so I was thinking I might get a travel swing. But, I was also thinking that it would be nice to put that money toward a more structured carrier. Courtesy of friends (both internet-- hi, Alexicographer!-- and IRL-- hi, Charlotte!), I have a few different styles of slings. And J.ack LOVES the sling (especially the Baby K', but sadly, I'm either not using them right, or I'm still weak from the pregnancy, because they kill my back. Granted, my back hurts pretty much all the time anyway, but wearing in a sling is more than my back can take right now. I got a less-expensive front carrier kind of thing, but H didn't like it (it was too complicated for him to use). I hear amazing things about the Erg.o carrier, but for PETE'S SAKE. The S.O.B. costs over $100! And that's not including the necessary infant insert doodad. I'm all for making that investment if it works, but my GOD. I just can't imagine spending that much on something that may or may not be of that much use to me. And of course, ultimately, I would need two of them, if we ever wanted to go anywhere without a stroller. Sigh. Yet another "if we only had one..." thing.

So, advice? What would you use the money for (it's around $100)? Maybe screw the baby crap and spend it going out to dinner with H? Save it for later? Fritter it away on Peanut M&Ms and root beer? Medicine? What would you do?

Thursday, July 8, 2010

List Style, On The Quick...

A few quick notes:

1. The stroller is a Kolcraft Contours tandem stroller, with two infant seat attachments. Those seats are their car seats, only strapped to the stroller frame. It's not quite as intense as it looks, but it is RIDICULOUSLY heavy, even without the regular kid-sized seats attached. I can barely lift it by myself, and it takes up almost our entire trunk. BUT, it handles like a dream, so that's good, right? Eventually, we'll switch to an umbrella-type, but for now, it's great to be able to strap the car seats on and go.

2. I know, I know. You really only come here for the pictures...

Kate and Boys at Pilot Mountain
Me, plus boys (Henr.y left, Jac.k right...) at a local state park. We drove the half-hour or so up there, got out, took 3-4 photos, and got back in the car. The heat is UN-FLIPPIN'-REAL right now. Yes, I'm from Tejas, where the heat is always un-flippin'-real, but after the absurd winter we had, the hundred-degree baloney is not okay. Seriously. Blech. I unshaded the boys for about 20 seconds, and freaked the whole time that I was boiling their little brains!

3. Most notable thing about the above photo???


Granted, they were my "fat, bloaty, I-haven't-run-for-a-week" cut of pre-pregnancy-sized jeans, but still. The twin-mom-diet-plus-nursing is really great for losing weight. It's terrible for overall fitness levels, but all told, I gained 61.5 lbs during the pregnancy, and as of two weeks post-partum, I has lost 50 of it. Obviously, the remaining 11.5 lbs are most unflatteringly distributed, and all that running muscle is LONG gone, but yeah. I kinda want to go back to that bitchy first OB I had and give her the finger for trying to make me worry about weight gain. Clearly, I gained exactly what I needed to in order to have healthy, full-term twins. And while I'm not out of the woods yet, I am not anywhere near as far as I feared I might be after that kind of weight gain.

4. Lastly, for those of you that had a caesarian birth, how long before you were "allowed" to return to normal activity levels? I hear anywhere from two to six weeks. My OB doesn't do follow-up with his patients until the six week mark, but honestly, I am SUPER eager to get back to the treadmill, if not for fitness, then for sanity. And yeah, I'd love to have sex again, too. But, I'm still kind of worried that it's too early. Also, how long should one expect to be all gross and oozy in the nether-region? I'm getting really sick of the random bursts of goo, and it's starting to feel like it's been a little too long. All the information that they gave me when I left the hospital says things like "normal for 7 to 10 days" and it's been over three weeks. Oh, and while my feet are no longer swollen, my hands are horribly swollen, and the carpal-tunnel/weird thumb thing hasn't gone away and has actually gotten 1000x worse, like I can't lift a baby without my wrists screaming in pain. Anyone know anything about this? Or anyone have experience with thrush? How long should I expect my nipples to feel all stabby-pain-on-fire-kill-me-now after I start treatment? Or is this a problem with the boys' latch, because it doesn't hurt anywhere near as bad when I pump. Sigh. Any advice for me?


Anyhow, things continue to be pretty much okay. We're still figuring things out as we go along, and there are still things to work out, but just when I feel like I can't take anymore, the boys take pity on me and give me a three hour stretch of sleep, and I suddenly feel like maybe (just maybe) I might be able to wake up and do this again, for at least one more day. Sigh. I find myself feeling both jealousy and pity for people with singletons. It is seriously SO hard (though I wonder if trip or quad moms laugh when they hear twin moms say that...). It's not just twice as hard. It's 3, 4 or 5 times as hard, because you just don't have the energy or ability to meet the needs of both babies, and that is torture to a new mother, to barely be able to satisfy one baby, and to have to sit and listen while the other screams and screams and screams and to know that you just can't do anything about it. Feh. But yeah. Getting to see two babies smile in their sleep is delightful, and I'm so glad that I get to experience that part of it.

And now, the fussing begins again...

Monday, July 5, 2010

No time for titles...

So, what happens when you have twins is that you write really great posts about things like thrush (SCREW YOU, THRUSH...), or coping with the difficulties of two-at-once, or various other things that occur to you in the early days of parenthood-- only you write them in your head. Or if you do manage to type them out, you don't get a chance to finish them, and you forget and spend three days wondering why no one is responding to your post (is nipple-yeast really that offensive?).

And then you look up and the post you started earlier has been sitting there for three hours while you rock and feed and soothe one screaming baby after another.

The walls start to close in after a while.

Which is why I've been trying desperately to get out of the house at least once a day, even if it's just to drive through Starbucks. And it helps. I fully recognize that life is totally different with babies, but I just cannot stand feeling paralyzed by having infants at home. And I don't think I need to either. I think it's important to get out, especially right now, while they are relatively portable. Even though I'm guided by the at-most-three-hour increments between breast feed times (I'm not yet adept enough to BF twins in public...), I still try to get out anyway.

And so, here was our "big" outing for Independence Day:

A walk in the park, which they both slept through...

And, it's feeding time again...